Richard's Story

My life story is that of God guiding me to Him even when I was not aware of it or, at times, wanting His guidance. I did not grow up in America. I was born and raised in Malaysia. My father was a "free-thinker" and an atheist. My mother followed Chinese religions and that meant making the proper visits to temples to secure the family fortune. Christianity was a Western religion -- the religion of British colonizers. We were Chinese and followed Chinese beliefs and ways of life. The exception was where education was concerned. The Western-styled education system was a superior education system to the Easter-styled system. The best schools in town were the Roman Catholic and Anglican schools. There was no question in my parents' minds which school was appropriate for me. It was St. Joseph's -- a Roman Catholic school. It was the best in town. I was enrolled in a Roman Catholic school when I was old enough.

I became aware of God through Roman Catholic Christianity. I realized from a very early age that the worship houses of the Christian God were much more pleasant than the Chinese temples. I was always uneasy at Chinese temples. An unpleasant fear was a dominant underlying emotion. The temples were dark, oppressive, and scary. The cathedrals, in contrast, were pleasant and peaceful. I wanted to be baptized as a Roman Catholic, but my father disallowed it. He said there was only one father and that was he. To him there was no father in heaven that I should bow to. My allegiance was to him and not to some English god. "What has this father in heaven ever done for me?" he asked. My father was my provider. Nobody else! He gave me money, clothes, toys, education, food, everything. That made sense to me, and I was 10 or 11. "But why were there so many Chinese Christians?" I asked. I don't remember his answers but I didn’t think they were satisfactory ones.

God again used the human education system to draw me closer to Him. The Singapore education system was better than Malaysia's. In the pursuit of the best education money could buy, my father sent me off to a boarding school in Singapore when I was 15 years old. It was called St. Andrews, an Anglican private school.

There at St. Andrews', in addition to academic pursuits, I learned from teachers and new friends that God was a better choice than the frightening Chinese deities. I also learned that Jesus Christ was God, and He didn't just die for all the wrong things I had done, but He loved me despite the fact that I didn't even know Him. My sins would be forgiven if I accepted Him as my personal Savior.

That was it? No other penances? Just a decision? It was amazing, yet too good to be true. How could that be? I remember a lucid moment in time when I realized I had to find out and be 100% sure if Christianity was real, or if it was just man's imagination as my father had said. If my father was right (i.e. that it was man’s imagination and wishful thinking) and I became a Christian, then I would have lost nothing and would have lived a decent life. If my father was wrong, then the penalty of not following Jesus Christ was eternally too painful. The choice to be a Christian was mine to make; not my father's. I was at a crossroad. The potential for less pain appeared to be a better choice. I decided to try Jesus Christ. That was in 1979.

What a decision! I now know it was the right decision. He led me down that road in making that all-important decision. How do I know that? With the benefit of 20-20 hindsight, I can see God continued to intervene in my life at various crossroads. That was not the only time. In one particular crossroad of my life He intervened to strengthen me when I did not know any better. I came to America in 1982 to attend Syracuse University (SU) and by the end of my freshman year I was ready to give up on God. There were too many temptations in life for a freshman. I didn't want to be reminded of what the Bible said regarding many temptations. I tried to resist but I was losing that fight. Furthermore, I could not answer the many challenges thrown my way by my college peers. I was laughed at for being a Christian; ridiculed in some circles, tolerated by kinder ones. Finally, in the summer of 1983, I told God to leave me alone.

Well, God did not. That summer I met Mark who was on staff with an organization called the Navigators. Through that friendship, I learned the root of my troubles was that my understanding of God was not based on the Bible but on my feelings, emotions and what other men had to say. God, through Mark, taught me to base my faith in the Bible. I learned to let the Holy Spirit guide me through life with the Bible as the instruction manual. I relearned to pray to God regularly and I saw God answer my prayers! Wow! I learned to belong to a group of practicing Christians. I realized part of my problem was being a loner Christian who knew the 10 commandments and some collection of Bible verses, but had a shallow understanding of God. I depended on my feelings alone to justify my faith. When the realities of life challenged my faith, I found out emotions alone was a very poor foundation to stand on. So God, through Mark, taught me that His Word in the Bible was a better foundation to weather the trials of life. What a valuable lesson for the rest of my life since. God came to my aid when I needed Him most.

My life as a Christian has not always been beset with doubts. There have been many joys. For example, through the group of Christians I came to know and loved at SU, I met my lovely wife, Megan. God has blessed us with two wonderful boys. God has given us successes in many ways and an unexplainable joy even when things were tough. The Bible says in Ps 34:8, "Taste and see that the Lord is good". It is true! I can say that has characterized my experience in life. I was invited to taste God in 1979 and I have seen and can testify that indeed, the Lord is good. The second part of that verse says, "Blessed is the man who takes refuge in Him." I have learned to take refuge in Him. I have been blessed. I thank God. I am so grateful that he did not leave me alone in the summer of 1983.